Bad Ideas

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Bad Ideas

Post by Professor Voodoo on Tue 5 Oct 2010 - 20:49

The cyborgs are pre-programmed to be experts in their particular fields, but that doesn't mean every idea they have is a good one.


Marisa: Elio!  I swear, this will work!

Elio: (facepalm) Mari, just drop it...

Jean: Where the hell did she get that boat?

Ferro: Where the hell did she get a belt-fed machine gun!?


Last edited by Professor Voodoo on Tue 22 Apr 2014 - 22:01; edited 1 time in total

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by MP5 on Tue 5 Oct 2010 - 21:05

Triela returns from a training session with GIS for old times' sake.

Allison: Hey Triela, Welcome back!

Petra: How are the GIS guys?

Triela: They're all doing really well. I made sure to get some pictures.

Allison: Anything new with them?

Triela: Well, they're apparently trying out different techniques. they recently picked up some kind of idea from China... (she fishes out her camera and shows the image to the girls)



Triela: Frankly, I don't think that's a step in the right direction...

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by crazyidiot78 on Tue 5 Oct 2010 - 21:23

LOL ROTFL
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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Robert Frazer on Tue 5 Oct 2010 - 23:18

"Um, Avise, sir?"

*Avise looks over newspaper* "Yes, Agapita, what's the trouble?"

"No problem, sir, I've just been reading up on tactical doctrine like you told me to."

"Aha, very good. You need to ask me a question regarding it?"

"Well... make a proposition, if I may. You see, I've been looking at parachute regiments. They are still valued for their intense training which makes them elite assault forces, even though parachuting itself is obsolete."

"The Americans did a drop during Gulf Two, if I remember rightly."

"Yes, sir, but they didn't actually fight anything."

"Fair enough, well read. So, my dear, what beam of insight is going to revolutionise the strategy of our professional arms?"

"Parachuting can be difficult to co-ordinate and supply, but the principle of disruption behind enemy lines is sound and valuable. Soldiers are also exposed and vulnerable during the drop, as they discovered in Crete and Holland - even in Mogadishu, to use modern helicopters - so the real question is the speed of delivery, to strike hard and fast and leave the enemy reeling as they are attacked from unexpected quarters."

"I see. How do you propose to achieve that? The Agency is cutting edge but we're not quite at the stage of perfecting teleporters yet."

"If I can be allowed to be bold... well, it's something that I specialise in!"



"See! I can be even more useful to the Agency now!"

"...Yes, your thick skull is a positive bunker-buster."

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Professor Voodoo on Tue 5 Oct 2010 - 23:38

@Robert Frazer wrote:Agapita: If I can be allowed to be bold... well, it's something that I specialise in!
Well, she is the agency's go-to girl for all your artillery needs.

Marisa: Hey, wait a minute! Who says parachuting is obsolete!?
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...all cyborgs have been formally reminded to look both ways before crossing the street.

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by FearTheLASERFACE on Tue 5 Oct 2010 - 23:55

Lol, Cyborg vs Car.
Winner: Cyborg.
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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by MP5 on Wed 6 Oct 2010 - 0:32

@Professor Voodoo wrote:

Marisa: Hey, wait a minute! Who says parachuting is obsolete!?

Kyo and Ryo (who are both airborne qualified and do combat jumps on a regular basis): Yes... just how is parachuting obsolete?

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Professor Voodoo on Wed 6 Oct 2010 - 0:51

@MP5 wrote:
@Professor Voodoo wrote:

Marisa: Hey, wait a minute! Who says parachuting is obsolete!?

Kyo and Ryo (who are both airborne qualified and do combat jumps on a regular basis): Yes... just how is parachuting obsolete?
Well, from a tactical/strategic point of view Avise has a point...on the modern battlefield it's just easier to bring in troops in other ways. Unfortunately, telling that to cyborgs who enjoy jumping out of airplanes is like telling them gelato is obsolete.

Henrietta: Now you're going too far!

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Alfisti on Wed 6 Oct 2010 - 4:10

Looks like something the A-team might have come up with...

Monty: I thought Alberto was MI6... not Special Boat Service.

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Awinnell on Wed 6 Oct 2010 - 12:12



some of the cyborgs got ideas after watching McGuyver !

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by zarien85 on Wed 6 Oct 2010 - 22:32

Full of Win

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by FearTheLASERFACE on Thu 7 Oct 2010 - 20:01

ROFLCOPTER! Mio Says Wut?
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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by ElfenMagix on Thu 7 Oct 2010 - 20:14

When Jean was about to tell Claes about Rabello's death, he placed this gun on her lap. Good thing she froze instead of using it...

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by ElfenMagix on Thu 7 Oct 2010 - 20:37

Some of the secrets of the SWA have to remain secret...
Cyborg #0341487512... aka "George"



Lorenzo: When I say to get them young, Bianchi... I DID NOT MEAN TO GO ROB THE CRADDLES!!!


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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by funkmachine on Fri 8 Oct 2010 - 7:36

now cost cuting means that the air force get to fit self aiming guns

i hear that there saveing up to build a new steath fighter

and there testing new humve size fighter planes


but the army has it harder still no new humves or APCs,but i hear good things about the mounted.

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Professor Voodoo on Mon 11 Oct 2010 - 3:25



Allison: See, I told you I could jump it...you owe me €10!

Kara: No way! You had to land it successfully too!



Allison: You didn't say that. The bet was that I could jump it...you never said anything about landing it.

Triela: Has anyone given any though to how we're gonna get this tank back to the motor pool without any adults noticing?

Kara: Hmmm, we didn't really think that far ahead.


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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by zarien85 on Mon 11 Oct 2010 - 20:36

ROTFL

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Kiskaloo on Tue 26 Oct 2010 - 14:12

Speaking of bad ideas, let's hope for the Agency's sake that Allison doesn't come across last night's Top Gear Australia (03x02). Between the Race to the Sky hillclimb and Ken Brough's madly modified WRXs the hosts used to tackle the course, things probably won't go well once Allison says "so that episode got me to thinking"... Yikes!

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by SPARTAN 119 on Tue 26 Oct 2010 - 22:30

Priscilla's latest creation:


Also, something for Michele's plane collection: Japan's new F-X Stealth Fighter:
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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Kiskaloo on Tue 26 Oct 2010 - 22:37

"This plane cannot be seen...it has, however, picked an obvious place to park."

Nuke

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Alfisti on Tue 26 Oct 2010 - 22:40

@Kiskaloo wrote:Speaking of bad ideas, let's hope for the Agency's sake that Allison doesn't come across last night's Top Gear Australia (03x02). Between the Race to the Sky hillclimb and Ken Brough's madly modified WRXs the hosts used to tackle the course, things probably won't go well once Allison says "so that episode got me to thinking"...
Argh, I missed that episode... got caught up at post-uni nibblies (sorry, but cheese platter and crackers still beats Top Gear Razz )

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by ElfenMagix on Tue 26 Oct 2010 - 23:28


Padania laughed when they heard the SWA spend Euros on 4-wheeled bicycles with mounted machine guns...



Then they found out Triela would be riding that 4-wheeled bicycle.

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Professor Voodoo on Wed 27 Oct 2010 - 8:11

@SPARTAN 119 wrote:
Japan's new F-X Stealth Fighter:
@Kiskaloo wrote:"This plane cannot be seen...it has, however, picked an obvious place to park."
They stole that idea...Wonder Woman has had an invisible jet for decades!





Elio has his own take on it...

Marisa: You know what would be really cool...if i had a dirt bike. I could use it on missions for recon and stuff.

Elio: I'm sure...well I already bought you a bike.

Marisa: Really!? Where is it?

Elio: It's invisible.

Marisa: You suck.

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Robert Frazer on Wed 27 Oct 2010 - 9:14

AVISE: (looking at the jumping tanks a few posts up) Ah... those were the days!



AGAPITA: So, sir, why do you make me run everywhere when you had a vehicle to carry you everywhere comfortably and sitting down?

AVISE: A very good question, my dear. You can have ample opportunity to reflect on it during your next ten laps of the compound perimeter.

AGAPITA: ...I should have seen that coming.

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by zarien85 on Wed 27 Oct 2010 - 18:44

nice

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Alfisti on Sun 31 Oct 2010 - 6:13

Allison: Mr. Alberto! Mr. Alberto!

Elio: What is it Allison?

Allison: Come down to Q-branch, me and Fiona have something for you.

A short time later.

Allison: Check it out! Now you and Marisa will be able to get to your missions in record time!


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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Professor Voodoo on Sun 31 Oct 2010 - 6:57

@Alfisti wrote:
Allison: Check it out! Now you and Marisa will be able to get to your missions in record time!
Somebody needs to explain to Allison the concept of "hull speed." A long and lean hull can make better speed with less power than short & wide with...well...eight 250hp outboards.

Marisa: It may not make any sense, but it still looks like fun.

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Kiskaloo on Sun 31 Oct 2010 - 11:24

@Professor Voodoo wrote:
@Alfisti wrote:
Allison: Check it out! Now you and Marisa will be able to get to your missions in record time!
Somebody needs to explain to Allison the concept of "hull speed." A long and lean hull can make better speed with less power than short & wide with...well...eight 250hp outboards.

Marisa: It may not make any sense, but it still looks like fun.

Kara: "Mr. Alboreto, you need to understand Clarkson's Second Law of Power: More is better."

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by zarien85 on Mon 1 Nov 2010 - 20:35

lol cheers

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by ElfenMagix on Sat 6 Nov 2010 - 0:43

Rachel: Daddy told me to get back by 5:30! So Dont Get On My case About The Mess! I Made It In By 4:55!

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Alfisti on Sat 6 Nov 2010 - 0:58

@ElfenMagix wrote:Rachel: Daddy told me to get back by 5:30! So Dont Get On My case About The Mess! I Made It In By 4:55!
That's the only problem with gliders... you only get one shot at landing.

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by ElfenMagix on Sat 6 Nov 2010 - 1:14

Weeks into their flight training, Cleas and Kara get their solo flight; Kara first.

Kara: Everything fine back there?

Claes: Yeah... :lol!:


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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Professor Voodoo on Sat 6 Nov 2010 - 1:48

Careful Claes...I know from personal experience that the one in the front seat can easily make the one in the backseat barf.

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by zarien85 on Sat 6 Nov 2010 - 20:19

nice

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Professor Voodoo on Tue 1 Feb 2011 - 10:35

Fernando looked into the option of getting a new 4-wheel drive Porsche Cayanne but eventually decided it would be too expensive.

His girls then took matters into their own hands...


Francesca: You know, I'm having second thoughts about this.

Rachel: Just leave the thinking to me, Einstein.


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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Kiskaloo on Tue 1 Feb 2011 - 11:39

Kara: "The only decent-looking car Porsche ever made, and you two numbskulls had to do this to it!"

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by zarien85 on Wed 2 Feb 2011 - 16:41

Good

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by crazyidiot78 on Wed 2 Feb 2011 - 20:42

Man thats like something right out of the Beverly Hillbillies.
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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by MP5 on Mon 7 Feb 2011 - 0:48

Presenting the most delicious weapon ever:



Your eyes do not deceive you... that is an AK-47 made entirely out of Bacon.

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by zarien85 on Tue 8 Feb 2011 - 13:02

that is kind of cool

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by theprodigalson on Tue 8 Feb 2011 - 13:18

@zarien85 wrote:that is kind of cool

Sure is. Whats more - sustained fire can heat the barrel enough to actually cook the bacon. Then, when you pause to reload, take off a strip of bacon and give yourself a reload too!

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by ElfenMagix on Tue 8 Feb 2011 - 16:45

You can always have something to match with the gun at Hats of Meat . com

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Guest on Wed 9 Feb 2011 - 13:03

Here you go. There is invisible car that remind me of Mermaidman and Barnacleboy's Invisible Boatmoble from Spongebob Squarepants.

Guest
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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Schaschanist on Wed 9 Feb 2011 - 16:24

i think this car really needs an invisible-mode:


The ugliest car ever, a Mohs Ostentatiene Opera Sedan from 1967.


The Ostentatienne Opera Sedan was offered at a F.O.B. price of $19,600 (1967), had a weight of 5,740 lb (2,600 kg), and sat on a 119 in (3.02 m) wheelbase. Prices have also been quoted at $25,600. [1] Tires for the vehicle were nitrogen filled 7.50?x20? (USA). The Ostentatienne was powered by an International Harvester truck engine. Entry into the car was from the rear; solid steel side rails (designed to protect passengers during a crash) prevented doors along the vehicles sides. The Ostentatienne could be ordered customized to suit its buyer?s wishes; Ming styled oriental rugs, refrigerators and sealed beam taillights were some of the options available. Production is estimated at three to four vehicles per year.

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Odon on Thu 10 Feb 2011 - 22:17

When you absolutely, positively, have to get every handler in the Agency pissed out of their minds...


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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by MP5 on Fri 11 Feb 2011 - 0:44

@Odon wrote:When you absolutely, positively, have to get every handler in the Agency pissed out of their minds...


Coincidentally, Allison bought one of these on the Top Gear Italy Road Trip.

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by WEBER on Fri 11 Feb 2011 - 19:23

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Kiskaloo on Fri 11 Feb 2011 - 20:54

That is a crime against aesthetics and legacy.

What worries me is that when Rolls-Royce released the 100EX Concept Car to celebrate their 100th Anniversary, they swore it would never be put into production, but a few years later we had the Rolls-Royce Phantom Drophead Coupé (sans the concept's V16 engine).

So I'm worried this piece of rolling feces might actually show up in the PM's motorpool some day. Smile

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Professor Voodoo on Fri 11 Feb 2011 - 21:18

@Kiskaloo wrote:So I'm worried this piece of rolling feces might actually show up in the PM's motorpool some day. Smile
If I were a betting man I'd lay odds against it. Would Morgan try it? Sure. VW/Bugatti? Maybe.

But Rolls-Royce? Their buyers demand a reputation of stately conservatism and this certainly doesn't fit that description. Even the "wildest" Rolls model is pretty stodgy by mainstream standards and I doubt the company would be willing to risk its market image by putting such a thing into production.

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Re: Bad Ideas

Post by Kiskaloo on Fri 11 Feb 2011 - 22:35

@Professor Voodoo wrote:
@Kiskaloo wrote:So I'm worried this piece of rolling feces might actually show up in the PM's motorpool some day. Smile

If I were a betting man I'd lay odds against it. Would Morgan try it? Sure. VW/Bugatti? Maybe.

But Rolls-Royce? Their buyers demand a reputation of stately conservatism and this certainly doesn't fit that description. Even the "wildest" Rolls model is pretty stodgy by mainstream standards and I doubt the company would be willing to risk its market image by putting such a thing into production.

Very true.

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Re: Bad Ideas

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