Captain Obvious presents: Grenade Safety Tips

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Captain Obvious presents: Grenade Safety Tips

Post by SPARTAN 119 on Sat 30 Apr 2011 - 18:12

Due to a recent increase in Yakuza attacks involving hand grenades, a spokesman of the Fukuoka police by the name of Captain Obvious had made this statement: Hand grenades are weapons designed to kill people by propelling shrapnel. If you discover a grenade, do not touch, tread on, or kick it.

In another Fukuoka grenade-related story (from the same article), apparently a couple of Yakuza blew themselves up in a failed grenade attack.
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Re: Captain Obvious presents: Grenade Safety Tips

Post by maverick375 on Sat 30 Apr 2011 - 18:45

Where the hell are they getting grenades??!!

Okay, I know there's a black market wherever there's crime, but seriously... grenades are indiscriminate weapons. Yes, shrapnel from a grenade can reach 200 meters away, albeit in minor injury form. But given the close ranges involved in the average Japanese city, I wouldn't think to use one simply to cack the other guy. It's so much easier just to shoot him. Just as loud. Less chance for an unsightly accident.

Dumbasses.

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Re: Captain Obvious presents: Grenade Safety Tips

Post by Officer_Charon on Sat 30 Apr 2011 - 19:00

How... American of them...

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"The two loudest sounds you will ever hear from your weapon are the *bang* when it's supposed to go *click* and the *click* when it's supposed to go *bang*." -Unknown

"220 horses, I got a gun, a siren, a tank full of city gas. Don't you love it?!" - Ofc. Maurice "Bosco" Boscarelli, Third Watch
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Re: Captain Obvious presents: Grenade Safety Tips

Post by Awinnell on Sat 30 Apr 2011 - 19:15

well they were going after a room full of other gang members so it does sort of make sense to use a grenade,chuck it in and hope the walls are strong enough to stop the fragments from killing you.


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Re: Captain Obvious presents: Grenade Safety Tips

Post by Officer_Charon on Sat 30 Apr 2011 - 19:25

Funny thing about drywall... it DOESN'T stop grenade fragments... *dark chuckle*

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Si vis pacem, para bellum

"The two loudest sounds you will ever hear from your weapon are the *bang* when it's supposed to go *click* and the *click* when it's supposed to go *bang*." -Unknown

"220 horses, I got a gun, a siren, a tank full of city gas. Don't you love it?!" - Ofc. Maurice "Bosco" Boscarelli, Third Watch
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Re: Captain Obvious presents: Grenade Safety Tips

Post by Robert Frazer on Sat 30 Apr 2011 - 19:35



This is a "crowbar", also known as a "wrecking bar" or "pry bar". It is a tool with a variety of applications in construction-related contexts, but it may also be used as an improvised weapons that inflicts injury by means of transferring kinetic energy to a body part and amplifying the force of impact through a reduced contact area. If you see someone carrying a crowbar do not be alarmed, for it may be for a perfectly innocuous and authorised legitimate purpose. If the bearer of the crowbar is wearing a balaclava and running towards you shouting, this may be a context cue that he does not intend to use it in a licensed manner. The police would be grateful to be relieved of an administrative burden if dutiful citizens could remind these people of their error and advise them of appropriate carriage.

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Re: Captain Obvious presents: Grenade Safety Tips

Post by Officer_Charon on Sat 30 Apr 2011 - 19:56

*splutters* Dammit, Robert, I was DRINKING that juice, not BREATHING it. *chuckles*

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Si vis pacem, para bellum

"The two loudest sounds you will ever hear from your weapon are the *bang* when it's supposed to go *click* and the *click* when it's supposed to go *bang*." -Unknown

"220 horses, I got a gun, a siren, a tank full of city gas. Don't you love it?!" - Ofc. Maurice "Bosco" Boscarelli, Third Watch
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Re: Captain Obvious presents: Grenade Safety Tips

Post by Nachtsider on Sat 30 Apr 2011 - 20:00

The thing I find hilarious is the possibility that thanks to the non-inclusion of a picture of a stick grenade on that warning notice, nobody will know what the hell to do when one lands at their feet.

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Re: Captain Obvious presents: Grenade Safety Tips

Post by Odon on Sun 1 May 2011 - 1:55

Well apparently the Camorra is fond of stashing basketfuls of 'pineapples' everywhere, but that might be because they're worried about being attacked by cyborg child assassins.


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Re: Captain Obvious presents: Grenade Safety Tips

Post by Awinnell on Sun 1 May 2011 - 4:32


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Re: Captain Obvious presents: Grenade Safety Tips

Post by FearTheLASERFACE on Sun 1 May 2011 - 10:35

@Robert Frazer wrote:

This is a "crowbar", also known as a "wrecking bar" or "pry bar". If the bearer of the crowbar is wearing a balaclava and running towards you shouting, this may be a context cue that he does not intend to use it in a licensed manner.

OR if he's a Theoretical Physicist in an Orange HEV suit.
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Re: Captain Obvious presents: Grenade Safety Tips

Post by John_234 on Mon 29 Aug 2011 - 0:49

Guns are hard to find, grenades are easy enough to improvise, and plenty are leftover from older wars. They are devastating and have a huge psychological impact... what's so hard to understand about their use? Molotov cocktails are a from of hand grenade.

Though the fact they have to warn average people not to poke a grenade lying / thrown around by Yakuza is a bit telling about their introverted culture.

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